I am fairly new to the whole Social Networking gig, and have found sites like Facebook and LinkedIn to be great avenues to reconnect with old customers and keep in touch with new customers and prospects alike. I have been joining various groups and posting on their discussion boards and making connections with members of these groups over the past few months.
But I’ve been doing it all wrong!
Being so excited to connect with people, a lot of people; I lost focus on the networking skills I have developed over the last 19 years while being in the Promotional Products industry. Attending local networking events offers personal contact, one on one, face to face dialog with people, I always listen to the people I met and talk very little about me and my business. This is basic networking 101 and I have build some great friendships that have lead to a ton of business and referrals that have been priceless.
I didn’t realize I was becoming a borderline Social Networking Spammer until I received some harsh to the point words of wisdom from a Social Networking Professional.
If you are going to use Social Networking as an avenue to network and connect with others you really need to take the following message to heart. It opened my eyes and I will be a better online networker because of it.
This is the reply that I received after blasting off a message and posting all about me.
Tim, please take this as feedback not criticism…
There are million pages indexed in Google for what you are offering and each page means nothing to me. Why do you think your pages are any different? Is it because you and I are in the same Facebook group?
When I need a solution for what you have to offer I will turn to the network of people I like, trust and have built a relationship with to find it.
Likewise, I listen to people I like and trust so they are able to convince me I may need a service such as yours. I would only ever consider doing business with someone I really know and have built a relationship with.
That said, if the desired outcome of you introducing yourself to me is to have me buy from you, do business with you or in fact collaborate with you on any level your strategy is counter productive since at this point we do not know each other nor has anyone in my network referred me to you.
I will never listen to anyone who tells me they are interested in building a relationship with me then follows this statement with a self serving links all about them, their product or service.
That’s not social networking. It’s spamming and to think people of that caliber that have congregated in any social network see it any other way is miss-guided.
My point is, I am always open to meeting new people, new business relationships and opportunities. What frustrates me is that neither will be achieved by two people coming together to promote themselves.
Rather than ignore approaches like that I offer my un-filtered, heart felt feedback in reply.
Some people thank me for telling them the way I feel and we start over again, all of whom are now trusted connections, who I do like and listen to…they don’t even realize they do it…Others say f&$#k you then, I don’t hear from them again.
I hope you’re not one of them…
Can I suggest you have another pass introducing yourself with a focus on a desired outcome of you being “”Interested”, not “interesting”.
Tim Somers (aka x social networking spammer)
Bizarre Promotions, Inc.
Hey Tim,
I am not sure if you attended Podcamp Michigan, but one of the reverberated themes was the concept of not being “that guy.” I used to do concert promotion and I realized for a long time, I was “that guy.” As I got older, I realized that the most successful concert promoters were the ones with the most friends. If people liked you, then they would be more apt to attend your function regardless of what kind of event it was.
Obviously, we have to be sneaky about it, but it’s best to continue working hard at getting to know new people and maintain quality rapports with your current connections. In the end, it always works out that any business that is generated based on those relationships tend to be more fruitful than a linear one.
I’m planning to stick around, Tim, because I like to support local businesses. Nice to meet your acquaintance. It’s great to see other people growing in social media like I am!
Hadn’t heard of the Podcamp Michigan – you make some great points.
Wow… That was great to read and to be honest I think it will really help me. Thanks for posting that information.
Thanks Anthony, glad you found the post useful.
Tim, it takes courage and integrity to take a reply like that and do something positive with it. I’m glad you did and thanks for sharing a good example with the world.
Why thank you Ron – it would have been easy to get mad and fire off some hate message back, but I really had no idea how I was coming off and by no means wanted to be “That Guy”…thanks again for the comment.
Thank you for this article. I am not the other “gal” but have people request me on a consistent basis but don’t pre-introduce themselves. So when I send a thank you for their interest and quiry about themselves, generally 2% respond back. Also I do use a short 2 sentence description plus link since they took the time to request me, but do you really know me and what I may have to offer–I may just be another face of a “mutual friend.” I find those people just want to grow their numbers thru even my connections as well. I have gotten frustrated over this and started deleting people–yup, they were trying to sell me something, especially their music and I don’t even like that type. Real relationships are built over time and time for me to dwindle down my numbers and get to the heart of real networking and sharing. This is a bit longwinded but thank you and, yes, that’s it is quite fine to be honest and frank with “friends”.
Hey Gina, wow only 2% respond back, I never kept track but will and see how my response rate adds up.